Neighbours in Hell
by wooden cards
Summary: Kagura is happy with her new apartment. Though, all that changes when she meets her neighbour next door.


**Prologue: Moving House**

While the women her age were busy getting promotions, 1.5 carat diamond rings, or even due dates for a new additions to their families, she had gotten a spanking new ring of keys.

Ascending the stairs, her keys jangled with each step. She didn't have children or lovers or new jobs, but she had a new apartment. After saving up for so long, she was, at long last, able to move out of the disaster she called home, and get an apartment of her own. It was good, considering that she was supposed to be out of the house years ago at this age, and now that she did, she was renewed with a sense of responsibility, that kind that adults were supposed to have but she had always lacked.

Aside from a new perspective, the apartment had guaranteed that there would no longer be frequent visits from the police at unearthly timings, since, after all, she was living _alone_ this time, and not with that crazy brothers of hers who loved to turn up the music in his room during 3am workouts. Also, there was no need to waste her energy in arguing with him over his boxers, constantly fighting and speculating on whether it was washed or not. Kamui had a tendency to leave his things, unclean or not, all over the house like a dog eager to mark its territory, and she hated having to pick up after him every single time (that idiot was nearing his thirties, for god's sake).

After Umibozu had disappeared off to some journey like he had always wanted to, they started to play a silent, but consensual game of 'who would move out first'. Though nobody actually said it out loud, there was the things they'd say at random intervals, hoping to catch the other offguard and to agree. Things like, "pass me the milk" quickly escalated to, "you know, there's this new milk service at this apartment I just saw the other day". Relentlessly, they fought until she decided that, it was the bloody final straw, after he decided to empty the fridge for—what, the fifth time that day?—and that was when she had decided to forfeit the game and get herself a new home.

That idiot didn't even blink when he placed all her luggage outside, even half-heartedly congratulating her for not wanting to be an old spinster who fed off her brother (who the hell fed off you?! I've always been buying the groceries!) and then closing the door in her face.

So started our heroine's tale, halfway to her new home.

* * *

_My_ new home, Kagura repeated to herself as she came to stop at the number 203. A new home which she was going to have all to herself, she thought as she stuck the shiny key in the lock. One where she could do whatever she wanted. No need to starve due to depleting food stash – her wrist rotated clockwise – no annoying brothers – the brandished door unlocked with a click – nor any crazy neighbours watering in their pot plants with their peters. The last one was, of course, something that she hoped would be true.

Pushing the door open and callously kicking her shoes to one side, she bounced into the living room, which was bigger than her old house's.

"I'm home!"

* * *

After spending half of the day unloading her things, she was finally ready for the next step. Although she wasn't a very polite person, she'd try. She'd try to be in good relations with her neighbours.

Kagura was convinced that when she befriended all her neighbours, they'd be doing fun things like engaging in juicy gossip sessions with the other housewives. She had seen it countless times before, how they'd do the whole talking through covered mouths and malicious glances thing, or how they'd meet each other halfway up with big bags of groceries, just laughing and chatting all the way back to their apartments.

Yes, she was going to be like that, she thought as she swiped a random box of sukonbu off the kitchen counter, living that neighbor-isque life with her residential friends, exactly like those dramas on TV!

* * *

Kagura stood in front of door 202. Seeing the setting sun, and she figured that neighbor 202 would probably be at home from work already. She hadn't done this before, but she was optimistic that she'd have a new friend by the time she went home. Leaning forwards, she knocked it a few times, and made sure that it was loud.

There were sounds of shuffling from behind the door, and it opened.

In the doorway was Neighbour of 202, who wore nothing but a towel, wrapped around hip. His eyes landed on the box in her hands first, before settling on her face. When they made eye contact, she felt warmth on her cheeks – he _was_ kind of handsome, with those sharp red eyes and pretty face. That exposed chest of his didn't make it any easier. She caught herself staring a little too long at those abs, and quickly dipped her head in a short bow.

"Hi!" she greeted him as enthusiastically as she could. Semi-naked neighbor stared at her blankly, and her smile twitched. "I just moved in next door, and I brought these—"

"You can leave it at the burnable waste area downstairs." and the door unceremoniously closed in her face.

All the hopes and dreams and possibilities she buried in those orange skies were destroyed. Across the distance, the birds whom she initially thought were singing in the background, now sounded like mock laughter, taunting he who was still rooted in front of 202's door.

For a second she considered doing that move that her brother had taught her when they were kids: throwing the box of sukonbu so hard that it'd smash his windows and run away. A hit and run, as thanks for the jerk's behavior. Seething her way back, Kagura made sure that the sound of her slamming the door was loud enough for Neighbour 202 to hear. She took a piece of sukonbu and chewed on it, its sour tang soothing her cottonmouth.

Then, like a refreshed database, previous thoughts about him being handsome and all were completely eradicated, the impression replaced by a single title for him; a title that she was sure would stay for a long time: the asshole next door.

* * *

AN: I don't know what I'm doing, starting yet another series when I've got two I'm not even done halfway through. Still, don't we all love that jerk next door? I know our heroine doesn't (but she will, in time to come). Anyway, thanks for reading and let me know if you liked it with a review!


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